Crazy Train

Unlike my counterpart, at once terrified by her infantile predilections, I embrace mine whole heartedly and recommend it to all those in need of a better life.

I, as well, know the appropriate fork, am properly socialized and am capable of choosing suitable outerwear for imminent weather conditions. But as far as the foot in the mouth issue goes, I tend to lean more to the side of having an entire Podiatrist's patient roster list crammed cheek to cheek and all at once, which often times lead to my greetings and salutations to come off as garbled and undecipherable. But as I find "goodbyes" and "hellos" overrated and only the middles of stories interesting, I say "pish" on beginnings and ends, so it all works in my favor.

Now back to my personal party and celebration of inane behavior;

"Woo Woo, All aboard the crazy train!"

As the reader may have begun to sense, I am far more comfortable in my gelatinous skin that shakes like jelly as I roll around in wacky laughter while wiping away tears of joy. I refuse to cower in a corner, ashamed and isolated by my insanity. Not only do I encourage an audience to witness such elated transformations but I demand it.

So please feel free to join my followers, already in progress, down at Frankie's Tiki Room on alternate Tuesdays and Sundays (time to be determined). There will be streamers, finger painting and diaper genies strewn about. Luckily my fans will be going nowhere as their tiny infant legs have been removed by some limb greedy patron of City Center. Not to worry though, we promise to attach mechanical prosthetics the moment the show concludes.

Till then, "HATS and HORNS!"